David Thayer

Booksquare has a story about a lady who paid six thousand dollars at auction to have her name be a character’s name in Michael Chabon’s forthcoming novel. A Florida woman paid 25,000 dollars to be in the next Stephen King, hopefully not a rewrite of Carrie. For that kind of money she should be depicted as a combination of Helen of Troy and Mother Teresa, violent but spiritual, lovely but compassionate, a friend to manatees, hobos, toothless ex-hockey players, revered by entire coastal townships. Let’s hope she doesn’t hobble a writer, lash him to a mattress, and force him to write happy endings. She certainly should not be incarcerated, awaiting execution, with swarms of bees flying out of her mouth. Maybe Michael Chabon was a safer bet, a superior investment, even though that lady has foresworn bathroom remodeling in exchange for literary immortality.

One of the characters in my novel, An Aztec in Central Park, not available in stores due to a vast conspiracy, is named Tubby Ingram. If your name is Tubby Ingram, Tubby, or Ingram, go ahead and send me money. That way when editorial changes come down the pike, as they might, you can rest assured that Tubby won’t be shit canned in a flurry of last minute changes. Your name here.
Think about it.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, September 28th, 2005 at 2:42 pm and is filed under Biting the Apple. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.