Whilst Serving His Warrant, DCI Borchardt Makes a Significant Discovery
This is a fine fiddle. Having spent an uncomfortable night in the Mansard above the garage, I’m now watching the spectacle of this oafish Borchardt fellow collecting books from my library. He and Chalfont-Smythe are crowing about the Diana Gabaldon titles secreted between Earthly Powers and The Sot-Weed Factor, books large enough to impress even the Dutchess with their heft. ( I once fended off an intruder with the Burgess tome; a solid jab to the ribcage, followed by a smack with Gravity’s Rainbow. The fellow fled. As an aside, I hasten to add that I was not wearing a ceremonial kilt at the time, as was reported in the press. That aspect of the fray was invented out of whole cloth. Ha. )
As I heroically blog without benefit of morning ablutions or a change of clothing, I can report seeing a rabbit in a top hat in the wee hours this morning. Not unusual here. They have formals on the quarter. Of course, they keep a low profile when my famous lapin au chinois is on the menu. Depew emerges with his trusty double gauge…the struggle for supremacy is constant.
Borchardt is wondering aloud why ‘bodice rippers’ are concealed in the library. He’s taking the books into custody! Chalfont-Smythe is fanning the flames, reminding everyone that I fired the nanny after discovering she lacked any sort of literary bent. I thought she was typing her roman a clef in her garret. It was a CV! I’d envisioned a fifty-fifty deal on the profits once an ueber agent had been contacted. My literary hopes and dreams seem destined to be dashed!
Between this Borchardt fellow and rabbits in formal attire all hope of progress must be in abeyance until I regain control of the main house. I’ll thumb through copies of Publishing Trends while I wait. We really must catch a wave! TTFN.