Guest Blogger: Leo Tolstoy
In a coup for the Druidical & Literary, Leo Tolstoy dropped by the office to inqure about blogging. This being a weekend the only staffer available was Bobby G, cub reporter. Bobby is still upset about Johan Santana winning the Cy Young Award and he’s distraught that Pamela Anderson was a no show for the National Book Awards. Bobby kept his wits about him after Ken the Security Guard threatened Leo with a can of Mace.
BG: Hey, Mr. Tolstoy, when Hollywood adapted War and Peace were you pissed off? I was.
LT: What is that substance that leaps from a can and causes one to weep uncontrollably?
BG: That’s Mace. Ken used to work at the UCLA library.
LT: He seems philosophically adrift. Fortunately I’ve secreted a fresh apple beneath my beard. Tell me, young fellow, about this place you call the blogosphere. Is it real?
BG: I guess so. I don’t know how it works or anything.
LT: What of Czarist interference?
BG: Sports Illustrated has that problem, but we don’t. Maybe if we had advertisers that would be different. We do gossip mostly and try to promote the literary works of our owner.
LT: How dreadful.
BG: Oh yeah. Most of our readers are from Bulgaria.
LT: A lovely place.
BG: You know it’s funny that you smuggled that apple in here because this blog is called One More Bite of the Apple.
LT: What does it mean?
BG: Um, you know I’m only here on the weekend. My desk is in a stairwell. If you want, you can sit here behind the dashboard and blog for a while.
LT: What is this device?
BG: RSS feed. We’re not supposed to fiddle with it, but go ahead. Dude, I think your beard’s on fire. I’ll call Ken. No, wait, here’s some Dr. Pepper. Pour it on your beard. That was close.
LT: Blogging seems hazardous. Am I blogging now? Hello? What manner of madness is this?