Once again the boundaries of the mind are stretched a bit if only to accomodate the latest scientific evidence that a correlation might exist between spewing chemical waste into the atmosphere and climate change. Decades before Katrina crushed New Orleans, the city of Niagara Falls, New York, experienced the EPA’s verdict that certain of the town’s neighborhoods be plowed under. Where once stood houses there is a large earthen berm, a new brand of urban renewal, a Rust Belt tribute to the old slogan better living through chemistry and its codicil the land will renew itself in a few thousand years. Tiny microbes inside the berm are busy eating PCBs which conjures images of food eating contests, bald men in bibs, and mountains of peach cobbler. But what about the honeymooners, you ask?
They go to Niagara Falls, Ontario, across the gorge from the US city of the same name. As a child your reporter dwelled on the American side developing a hearty PCB fueled immune system while over on the Canadian side, young couples enjoyed a romantic view of the Horseshoe Falls, the Bridal Veil, and downriver The Whirlpool. My pal Lenny and I were way ahead of the global warming issue as reflected in this exchange:
Lenny: It’s hot today.
Me: Yeah.
Lenny: It’s gonna be hotter tomorrow.
Me: Hotter than today?
Lenny: Yeah.
Me: Are you gonna finish your PCBs?
Lenny: I’m full.
Lenny died at the seige of Khe Sanh in 1968. This what happens when I write about global warming which makes me think of Niagara Falls and that makes me think of him. You don’t have to be a scientist to know there are as many ways to die as there are reasons to impose the collective will whenever the urge arises. Unfortunately, fear of global warming may prove to be a form of optimism.