Realism on Life Support
I’m a fan of the Realism School, which is a one story brick building in upstate New York resembling a Moose Lodge. If I’m not mistaken Ralph Cramden was a Moose, or he played one on TV back when it was generally accepted that these things were not the same. Thus discerning viewers knew that Art Carney was not a sewer worker although his portrayal of one remains on the books as memorable.
The School of Realism teaches an appreciation for subtlety, now an endangered species on many fronts, although the Justice Department seems intent on redefining the term in the matter of DOJ versus Itself, a drama that C-Span called “riveting.” The Attorney General cannot remember why he fired a bunch of US Attorneys, introducing a very current literary trend into his reality. In fact he’s on solid ground if he sticks to the following genres:
Paranormal: He is a ghost, or Arlen is a spectre, or the entire oversight committee consists of the dearly departed who simply will not pass on. He cannot remember firing anyone because his consciousness is on another plane, a plane facing the usual delays.
Romantic Suspense: Somewhere in the committee chambers a vampire lurks. Mr. Gonzalez is protected from the bite by a magical polyester shirt: will he remember to wear it?
Tartan Noir: Gonzalez is tracked through the streets of Glasgow by Young Republicans in red blazers: he paints himself blue and counterattacks only to be arrested for historical violations.
Chick lit: once his best option, Gonzalez realizes that the Hair Club for Men reading list has him cornered. Where’s the manly stuff? he wonders. He debates ordering a gross of Aqua Velva before submitting his answers in writing.
Modernism, Post Modernism, Nihilism: drinking in an East Village biker bar Gonzalez is visited by the ghost of Dylan Thomas, and together they see the boys of summer in their ruin. He awakens on the beach at Crab Meadow at low tide: he remembers firing a bus driver, possibly Ralph Cramden. Gargantua and Pantagruel, employed by Suffolk County, issue a summons for vagrancy, but in the pocket of his polyester shirt Gonzalez finds an address: the School of Realism. Utopia. He remembers. Is it too late?
April 23rd, 2007 at 12:04 am
We haven’t been following the news at all on our little jaunt, so I’m grateful for your post. It brings me entirely up to date and let’s me skip reading three issues of The Economist when I get home.
Alberto ought to have hired you as an advisor before he got in any deeper. The ‘Paranormal’ route would probably fly with this administration
April 23rd, 2007 at 5:49 am
Next we’re covering the French election. The news cycle is 24-7.
April 24th, 2007 at 5:56 pm
Of all the things to remember, Crab Meadow at low tide. I guess it is unforgetable after all.