Literary Blog to Become Daytime Soap!
Wellington Leg: in a shocking development one of the Big Fat Guys announced that ONE MORE BITE OF THE APPLE will convert to soap opera format. “Who cares about books?” asked Fat Guy Bob. “We need to see some corporate sponsorship.” The deadline for the change is late Saturday afternoon when most critics are wondering whether to buy the Sunday paper on Saturday or wait for the ball scores in the later editions.
Hideous and Disgraceful: H&D is Wellington Leg’s premier media advisory firm and have been retained to advise the Big Fat Guys. Their enormous fee structure enables H&D to visit readers where they live, get up in their wheelhouse and deconstruct their consumption habits. For instance research reveals that most Legians want lite beer more than literary criticism while a vocal minority want both.
What of the Earl? Reading between the lines of this latest cultural skirmish eleven things become immediately evident:
The Big Fat Guys see a disconnect between media moguldom and greater personal satisfaction.
“The Whimsey of Fate” is a poor title for a business plan.
The Earl’s Beheading simply isn’t attracting corporate sponsors.
The Book Reviewer for the Druidical & Literary needs to be fired.
The Book Reviewer for the Druidical & Literary is writing the Pork Bellies report in the financial section as though trading on the Piltdown Exchange were a soap opera. “Not a bad idea,” notes Fat Guy Bob.
It’s difficult to save money by recycling baseball scores like 7-5 and 11-4 since readers want to know who won. “We can wean them off needing all this information,” H&D believes.
Some combination of baseball coverage and book reviews could appear at the end of the Sports ( and books) Section appearing on alternating Wednesdays.
We know the score. Pay us to find out.
Item Number Eleven? Do we have a math critic?