Wellington Leg: Black Friday arrived at just after ten this morning when Eddie Parker, owner of Eddie’s Book Nook, opened his shop and was flattened by a phalanx of Certified Shoppers. “I unlocked the door a few minutes early,” Eddie recalled. “I saw a big fat guy with a Bugatti teeshirt and a handlebar mustache. Then it was lights out.”
The big fat guy in question is Trent Kendle who wanted to buy a Kindle. “It’s not everyday that Apple Computer names a product after you,” he said. Of course the Kindle is from Seattle based Amazon, not Cupertino based Apple. And there is no product called the Kendle; still, Trent remains enthusiastic. “I want one,” he said. “I want one right now.”
Not Clear on the Purpose? Trent believes that the Kindle is the long awaited Babe Magnet science had been promising for years. To prove his theory Trent stood on a street corner in downtown Wellington Leg holding an oblong object painted a pastel color; for the purposes of verisimilitude Trent affected an interest in Jane Austen. He then waited for the babes.
Three hours later Trent was approached by Mrs. Millicent Hogarth of Flapping Close and asked by Mrs. Hogarth “what he thought he was doing?” The compound nature of the question with its postmodernist undertones briefly confused Trent since what he thought he was doing was evidently in conflict with what he was actually doing which at that precise moment was nothing at all. Thus his response, delayed by this procession of thoughts, fell on deaf ears.
Trent would like a refund and is considering filing a lawsuit. Science editor Jeff Scott Fitzgerald reporting.
[...] And guys, the Kindle can help you get chicks. [...]
A bookstore whose front door is being broken down by aggressively enthusiastic shoppers…what a wondrous, fanciful, relentlessly fictional place Wellington Leg is!
Pete, Eddie’s Book Nook is a superstore with a front room and a back room and sometimes a second cashier!