Towne Ventures to Curb Reading
<p> Wellington Leg: The towne council launched an anti-reading campaign today, banning numerous books and promoting television viewing despite the ongoing writers strike. Things got off to a fast start when, in a scene reminiscent of DUNE, Hizzoner floated to the ceiling of the Historic Rotunda before exploding. “Wow, that was cool,” said seven year old Wilson Pickett. “I’m never reading another book.”
The campaign’s official title is “Watch More, Read Less” although a printing glitch rendered the slogan as “I Know You Are, but What am I?” sending towne officials scurrying to Kinkos.
Wellington Leg Cablevision is a sponsor of the initiative. “We have a host of new reality shows for prime time,” said a spokesperson. “The Colony” looks promising. “The Colony” is filmed on an anthill where ants go about their business despite the intruding cameras and boom mikes. Eventually one of the ants leads of a warrior column toward a coveted albeit discarded peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
Among the works banned this afternoon are the Compleat Works of the Forty Third Earl. The monstrous tome was available in soft cover at the Wellington Leg Aerodrome where fog, rain, and Humphrey Bogart are thought to be trapped in the space time continuum.
Due to the inclement weather the earl was not available for comment. Urquhart Depew, an embittered dogsbody, remarked that the ban on the earl’s work “is long overdue.”
Geraldo reporting for Weekend in the Leg.