Balderdash Palace: The Dowager Princess is pleased that her effort to overturn the Louisiana Purchase is finally bearing fruit. Texas Governor Rick Perry hinted last week that Texas may secede from the union. “We would welcome Texas to our dominion,” said Consort Royal Nicola of the D’Urbervilles. “Just think how good our football team would be,” she enthused. Due to its tiny size and irregular terrain Wellington Leg has never been a football power. Wellington Leg maintains that Thomas Jefferson sold Louisiana Territory to the Princess’ maternal grandfather Archduke Leg. Documents from Kinko’s clearly show that a “TJ” signed a sale agreement with “AD Leg” long before Napoleon Bonaparte claimed the port of New Orleans for France.
To accommodate Texas Wellington Leg will hire the Mothra Removal Service to create a new slogan and an ad campaign. The towne’s current motto In Vino Veritas suffers from demo fatigue and dead language confusion. “We’re thinking “Don’t Mess with the Leg” said a spokesperson for the Palace.
The capital city of the combined Wellington Texas Leg would be Henley Hornbrook where the Dowager Princess maintains a stable of thoroughbreds who enjoy munching credit default swaps. A large herd of longhorn cattle would move from Wichita Falls to Goth as part of the ceremony.
With her ten gallon crown and pearl handled six guns the Dowager Princess should be a natural and benign ruler for Texas. Governor Perry would become a vassal prince, and, as she has done here in the Leg, the speed limit would be raised to 155 miles per hour.
T. Rex Love-Handles reporting.