Wellington Leg: As regular readers can attest this is a satirical blog full of imaginary characters in a mythical towne whose Triple A baseball team, the Fighting Gastropods, have dropped 345 games in a row. Even worse than baseball futility, however, is the encroachment of reality, actual events that are far more absurd than any satire this reporter can manufacture. In fact, this intrusion of incredible nonsense has created what is known as the “July Effect” a locking down of the creative brain due to sensory overload.
The shame of it is we were all set to introduce guest writer Little Mahmoud who recently opened a Myface Account here in the Leg. Little Mahmoud is new in towne, but no stranger to the spotlight as he once presided over an ancient and powerful land as its beloved President. And he’s a heckuva public speaker: quoting from his own page: “I am mesmerizing with turns of phrase so elegant as to induce tears.”
He’s a cocky little fellow who wanted only to be pals with the new kid, Barack, but it was not meant to be. Other kids called him names and soon little Mahmoud was not even allowed to go to Libya where former BFF Gadaffi lives. His pet duck died and it was time to move on.
Sadly, though, he missed his first assignment the resignation of Alaska governor Tsar Alexander. Why would the Tsar step down and sell the entire state? “I am thinking maybe his fingers are crossed behind his back,” Little Mahmoud said. “Perhaps the terms of sale exclude the fish,” he speculated.
Still, he is wistful. “Who will protect the powerful from the weak?” he wonders.