Wellington Leg: According to the authoritative Nano News a strike vote has set the stage for a walkout scheduled to begin sometime after midnight. The chief negotiator for the Wellington Leg Nano Cooperative, Erhardt Crisp, has warned the Privy Council that the nanobots are serious this time and want to join the Teamsters Union. “They want to drive tiny trucks into tiny places where large trucks cannot go,” Mr. Crisp said. “They want to frequent miniature truck stops and drink coffee; they want to watch Smokey and the Bandit.”
It’s a Very Small World: Nanobots and NanoWorkers were assigned to repair roads under Wellington Leg’s Economic Stimulus package according to shift foreman Gus of Goth. “It was windy yesterday and my entire nano crew wound up sixty miles away in a chestnut tree. I mean, these nano guys are small, okay? It takes about three million of them to polish off a Big Mac.”
One Square Inch at a Time: Nano bridge building crews have completed a one inch section of the First Avenue Extension not far from Fran’s Haus of Beauty the epicenter of the credit crunch. Readers will recall than Fran’s one thousand dollar loan caused CitiGroup to collapse. “Enough already about CitiGroup,” Fran said. “I’m trying to style some nano hair over here.”
A Basket Full of Kittens: Even before the news of A-Rod’s impending hip surgery foremen such as Gus were having difficulty managing the nanobots. “My full size Ram truck carries about sixty million of these guys; every time I stop for a light they scatter to the four winds ( are there only four? I thought there more) I spend half my day running around looking for these guys,” Gus complained. “That ain’t very stimulative,” he added.
Better Working Conditions: Nanites enjoy their own cafeteria while Nanobots fend for themselves at enormous vending machines. “They form nano chains to reach the coin slot but the quarters are way too big. Plus if they can get the quarter into the machine they are a Snickers bar away from catastrophe.”
Organizers predict that the nano vote will be close: “We think a few Cat hats ought to cheer them up,” said Erhart Crisp. “One hat ought to cover about forty million nanobots.”
T. Rex Love-Handles reporting.